Gamer Etiquette

I have recently seen some notable lapses in etiquette. While they were not all gaming related, I would like to focus on the gaming aspects of them, since that is what this site is all about. Etiquette can be defined as: rules governing socially acceptable behavior. Essentially, then, etiquette is the way you should act in a given situation. First in terms of what is expected of you, then in terms of how to make a positive impression.

Sportsmanship scores are a direct reflection of how other gamers perceive your behavior. While not everyone appreciates them, used correctly they give you valuable feedback on how others perceive you. To paraphrase Robert Burns, "Ah, to see ourselves as others see us." Use those scores to improve yourself (or to let you know that you are on the right track.) Some people want to improve Sportsmanship scores so that it will help them do better in tournaments, others do it because it makes them feel better. Quite a few people say that they feel Sportsmanship is the most important or the best award. When it boils down to it, I play these games to have fun. If I can have a good time while I play, and I can help the other player have a good time too, isn't that what it's really all about? Etiquette, however, is not merely about Sportsmanship, as that is typically only defined in direct relation to playing a game, where etiquette covers all social interaction as well, such as talking about a game.

Many discussions of Sportsmanship have gone before me, and they cover your actions before, during and after a game. While I want to focus on other parts of etiquette, I would be remiss if I didn't mention some of these. Immediately before the game, it is a good practice to offer to shake hands and introduce yourself. Smiling also helps to get the message across that you are enjoying yourself and are there to have a good time. Remembering that we are there to have fun, arguing over rules serves no purpose here. It is unlikely that your gaming partner will be swayed immediately by your logic, no matter how good, so you are just wasting valuable gaming time if you do argue. On the same subject, you can make your army fun to play against by not making it too one-dimensional. That doesn't mean you can't have a powerful army, just try not to max out on one thing and leave everything else out.

We all have our own opinions about the best way to do one thing or another. Consider the way that you share these opinions with others. First off, tell them what they did right. If they made some good army list choices, tell them. If they used good combinations of units or tactics, tell them. Don't start out by telling them what they did wrong. That's just going to make them stubborn and defensive, so that they feel they have to prove that they can use what you feel is a dumb army idea. After you've told them something good that they did, then tell them what you think let them down, or what you feel would help them be more effective. Make sure that you couch your advice in terms of suggestions. All too often I've heard gamers announcing with authority that their method is the only way that works (implying that anyone who tries something else is just stupid and wasting time.)

By far the biggest hurdle for gaming etiquette is online communication, such as in forums. As is typical of internet interactions, forums often have individuals that seem to forget their manners because of the anonymity that their username gives them. This is compounded by the fact that much of our communication is based off of facial expressions, tones of voice and body language, all of which are nonexistent online, which makes it easier to misunderstand someone. Be careful with your comments and remember that the reader will probably take your words directly at face value, even if you meant them as a joke.

First off, please try to make it clear what you are trying to say. You can start by trying to clean up any spelling mistakes. If you know you aren't good at spelling, you can typically run your comments through a spell checker, either online or by simply typing them up in a document before you paste them into the message you are posting. In addition, try to avoid subsituting numbers for letters or using typical chat or leet speak. If u r 2 lazy to chek ur speln, y suld i maek an efert 2 reed it? If you abbreviate words, it also makes it harder to understand what you are talking about, and if it gets to be too difficult to interpret your words, I'll just ignore them and go somewhere else. As an example, I was reading a post a while ago that kept referring to termis. Being a Tyranid player, I figured the poster was talking about Termagants, but his suggestions of how to use them didn't make any sense, until I realized he was talking about Terminators, an entirely different thing.

Second, try to make sure that you have some actual content in your message. Sure, you agree with the previous poster, but could you at least add something to the discussion other than, "Woo, yeah, I agree!"? For that matter, it may be a funny joke or a series of them, but if the only text you post is, "Wibble," then it's just putting more spam in the way of me getting the information I am looking for. (If you have to post something like that, try to add some on-topic information as well, so you can joke and have an actual conversation.) Finally, try to keep your posts on-topic. I go to a 40k forum to talk about 40k, not about how much beer you drank last night or how stupid your friend is.

Okay, so now we are making our messages readable and reasonably error-free, plus we are staying on topic and adding to the discussion in each message. Here are some additional things to help you do well in an online forum. Each of these things is something that I see violated frequently, and often results in the poster being ignored, which means that they don't get their questions answered, no matter how many times they ask. Frequent violations will likely result in other members ignoring ALL postings by the offender.

Be succinct. Make your point or ask your question, then post it. Don't put in an extra page of information. If it takes that long to say it, it's not just one point, and it can be split up into separate posts, much like this article is split into separate paragraphs. If you ask 10 questions in your email, it is highly unlikely that someone will answer every one of your questions. Further, it is likely that some of your questions will generate some discussion, which will make the others more likely to be ignored. The best way to get an answer to a question is to ask a single, direct question. If you have more than one question, simply make each one a separate post, so that others may comment on the ones they can help with and ignore the ones they cannot help with.

Do your own homework. Don't just ask what army you should play. How should I know what's right for you? On the other hand, if you have some information (even just the little blurbs you get from the GW website) then you can ask more intelligent questions, or you can tell me what you are interested in (looking for assault, probably shouldn't play Tau) so I can narrow it down. If you aren't willing to put any thought into it, why should I take my time to do so? Another common question I've seen is, "Make me an armylist." No. Do it yourself. A lot goes into creating a good armylist, and there are many choices you'll have to make, and then you have to go out and buy the models. Again, if you can't even be bothered to think about it, why should I? For that matter, if you haven't bothered to think about it, you'll probably just ignore whatever I post anyway. On the other hand, if you tell me what you are trying to accomplish and maybe tell me what you already have, I can do that. ("I'm trying to achieve a "no guns" Tyranid swarm, and I want a "swarm" style, so lots of little creatures...") That, my friend, shows me you have put some thought into it and presents me with the challenge of finding the BEST way to do it. If you haven't put thought into it, why should I? It's not my army.

Now, don't worry, I'm not going to go all "Miss Manners" on you, but good etiquette and clear communication are learned skills. Hopefully you will find this article useful, either in helping you to get your point across, or perhaps to help someone else get theirs across.

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